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At the risk of sounding rather unbelievable-I have to tell you that I completely GET what you just wrote about. I drive an hour to work right now- so that's plenty of time to think and daydream to music- something I love doing. This morning I was listening to a sad and beautiful song and the saddest thought in the world popped in my head- my deepest fear (Ruby or Atticus getting kidnapped). anyways, there I am sitting in the car with tears on my face with just the thought of it. I always thought I had my issues from being exposed to the most awful things as a social worker, Mark thinks I'm crazy. But I think its just that my mind has always created completely elaborate daydreams or scenarios both wonderful and horrible that bring the related emotions to the surface. So...you're not in the least bit strange to me (:

katie r

When I was about 8, I employed a strange motivation tactic during swim practice. I would tell myself that if I didn't get to the other side of the pool under a certain time, my sister Emily would die. Or my brother. Or my other sisters, or my mom or dad.

Sometimes I wouldn't make it fast enough. I'd feel guilty for a few seconds and then push it out of my mind and pretend it never happened. And then probably conjure up another high-stakes scenario involving death for the next lap.

I don't recall why it was never me that would die.


That last comment was from me, Chip, not Katie.

megan rich

So strange Katie, I do the same thing to myself once every couple of months. And it's usually while I am driving, oddly enough. And it always results in me crying. It used to be simple enough since I would just imagine either myself or Michael dying, but now that we have kids it's even more dramatic. weird.


I am still that girl too. I don't remember when or how it started, but I'm almost constantly imagining the bizarre accident-death of someone I love, or myself. Any kind of outdoor adventure that I engage in is riddled with my thoughts of "what if..." and the long, drawn-out scenarios of who would cry, what they would say, how we would go on, etc. But it happens with normal, everyday stuff, too. It is strange...and my husband didn't know this about me until after we were married. He finds it very odd, which it may very well be. But, it's nice to know that there are other people who do this same thing. :)

Chip - I chuckled at your high-stakes swim practice motivation technique. That's intense!!!


you're all freaks, I never think about that.


I actually posted about a similar thought pattern just this morning. so I think we the normal ones and everyone else is heartless.

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