katiedid

first day

today is the first day on my own with the three kids. this morning my sister and two (of her four) kids left for the airport to fly back home to oregon. sad for all of us, but especially my apartment, which has not been so clean or full of life in months. the girls are already making demands for sarah's return, and deep inside, i am too. it was glorious being so taken care of by one of my favorite people of all time.

so far the four of us are fine. an episode (or five) of diego and a super cape has eve happy while ruth seems satisfied staring at sleeping charlie and playing the "remember when?" game with me over and over. -ok. i just looked over at ruth and it turns out it wasn't the "remember when" that was entertaining her so much as the tube of lanolin she was smearing all over her lips, tummy and right leg. classic ruth.- if the rest of the day goes this well (ointment smearing aside) i may even be able to do something for chip, who is 33 today. happy birthday chip! here's hoping all you ever wanted for your 33rd birthday is leftover pizza and the latest episode of the bachelorette. . .

also, i've lost the ability to follow one line of thinking for more than four minutes, so here are eve and ruth with two of their respective current obsessions: mustaches (yogurt in this case) and animal puppets.

++ oh, and goo flu is gone. he died within 24 hours. so then came go-pen. i had high hopes for go-pen, he looked hearty. but four days later he was nose down too. the girls are now talking about death even more than usual, in semi-disturbing ways; "oh, i'm sorry mom, it looks like charlie's dead." so we're taking a break from fish for awhile. clear the air. and the water. 

happy belated birthday sarah!

oh i love you sarah. i love thinking of you wearing roller skates in the house and trying to convince mom that it was ok because it helped you clean faster. i love remembering of the hours you spent reading "les miserables" and "of mice and men" to me for my high-school english classes. i love that you ditched school to cheer me on in my 8th grade talent show. i love remembering you smiling, running down the hallway and up the stairs with our furious, teeth-clenched mom hot on your tail. i am still amazed at your ability to get to me; bleating "oh, poor katie" like a goat for 15 minutes strait until i lost it, sitting down next to me on the couch and ever so slowly pushing me over and then completely off, obnoxiously killing me at risk or monopoly until i threw the board and screamed that i would never play with you again, only to do the very same thing the next sunday. i love the letters you would send to me at girl's camp- complete with drawings, "skate or die" and "i skate, therefore i am" scrawled on the back. i love that you can beat almost anyone at any game involving quick thinking, logic or strategy but have asked me more than once how to spell the word "of." i love remembering the day when i realized i could count on you to defend me against any outside attack. i love that you taught me how to write my name in cursive before i was in kindergarten and that with your help i got into the real choir without having to audition before ms. perpall. i am so entertained by your terrible memory but i love that almost all of my childhood memories are incomplete until i remember your reaction, your help, or your company.

yes, you once made me sit in the way way back of the toyota because you were mad at me. and sure, i once wrote a song for you with the title (and only real lyrics) of "you ruined my life the first time i laid eyes on you" but even then i knew the words were ridiculous. because, no matter what, you were always a constant to count on for kindness, help, friendship and protection when i really needed it. and you are still that constant; the person i can look to and call (everyday) for understanding, perspective or just to laugh with. i love you sarah. oh how i wish we lived closer so i could see you and laugh with you everyday, but even with 3000 miles between us i am so happy to know you are a part of my daily life, that you are my sister.

happy (substantially late) birthday.

happy birthday (and christmas) david!

dave, i love that i cannot hear acdc without thinking of high-school you, your old blue truck and the mullet you sported. and then i think of your truck catching on fire -woops- and your replacement cars, first the 280zx, shortly followed by the geo metro whose bumper you "sewed" back together with big metal wire/staples, instead of just getting a new one after it was ripped off. i love your intense frugality and the incredible (although sometimes unsightly) solutions you come up with in order to save. the incessant "guess what? i love you!" game you played with little boy bobby still makes me smile. i cannot believe, but dearly love and am secretly jealous, that with a little soldering you turned a bike into a unicycle and legitimately taught yourself how to ride it all over our bumpy dirt roads. you are so quick to give a full, hearty laugh at my jokes and stories and that alone makes me love you forever. yes, you once rocket-launched me across the entire front room when i refused to get out of your way, but you also didn't yell at me when i borrowed your white shorts and then ruined an entire load of all your new clothes with the tube of lipstick i left in the pocket. it is amazing and so impressive that with a full family you went back to college, worked like mad and officially revealed that you're an engineering genius. i still can't believe you and erin have SIX kids, but i love the happy chaos and love that rules your home and how you are all just perfect together. when i was about 6 years old you pulled me out of too-deep water in a friend's pool just as i was about to start panicking for air. i was so relieved and grateful to have you as an older brother at that moment, and the feeling has stuck. happy (late) birthday dave. i love you.

happy birthday ruthie!

oh ruth. when i was pregnant with you i knew you'd be friendly. i had no idea how crazy and entertaining and mischievous you would be. i didn't know about that stompy, floppy run of yours, usually with mouth wide open in a crazed smile. i didn't know you would come programmed knowing exactly how to push every single one your sister's buttons and get wild joy from watching her react. i couldn't have imagined your almost annoying ability to charm your way out of any trouble. i did know that you would love people and they would love you, but had no idea how quickly you would capture people's adoration. i certainly didn't realize you would be so messy or have such a need to apply and spread anything and everything to every surface of your own skin. everyday. i didn't know about the smearing of the frosting or the hummus or the massaging of your own feet with that morning's cream-of-wheat. i didn't know the immense love affair you would have with food; the singing about it from your crib, the talking about being "hummy" at least every 20 minutes, and the immense amount of food you can shove into yor mouth without issue. i didn't realize the frequency of the kind hugs you would give to your sister and how quickly you could unite with her against all the world, including me. i didn't know how intense and determined you would be, nor did i have any clue that you would be able to mimic my voice and yoga positions almost perfectly, the first time. i didn't know how hard you would make us laugh and how so many of the things that i love the most in your father are the very same things i love in you. and i could never have known how much i really do love you, and how through you i would love eve, your dad and life even more than before. so, happy second birthday ruth. i love you and am secretly proud of you for testing me everyday. just as any good daughter should.

++
while i was typing the last half of this, you got a chair from the dining table, pushed it over to the counter, climbed up and then ate/destroyed nearly all of the mini ganache-covered chocolate cupcakes waiting for tonight's celebraion. the uneaten/uncrumbled ones you smeared on your belly. all in three minutes.

belated to chipper

i love you chip. i love that you can make me laugh in any situation. i love (although it really does drive me crazy) your constant paranoia that one of us is going to choke. i love that the first four thoughts i ever had about you were "his name's chip?" "he's skinny" "i like his hair" and "wow, he's so friendly." i love that on one of our first dates you got lost and we ended up just driving for over and hour, listening to music and laughing before finally finding our way. i love the memories of going to your studio and reading my psychology textbooks on the balcony while you painted. i love that you are the most honest person i have ever known, and consequently, the worst liar. i love how you become completely obsessed with ideas or projects that "could be so great." i love that you are constantly wanting to make everthing around you better. i love that you are so complete in your forgiveness. i love the way you hit your hand to your chest and hold it there when you laugh really hard. i love your strange knowledge about the classic rock genre. i love, really really love, thinking about the time you thought you broke your ankle. i love your unreasonable fear of rats and sharks. i love thinking about what a terrible apologizer you are. i love that you can sleep anywhere. i love imagining us old together. i love watching you dance with the girls. i love that you love them so much, and that they adore you in return. i love the stiff-arm stance you get whenever your are trying on a jacket or shirt. i love that you talked me into marrying you, because you were just sure it would be great. i love it that you were right.

happy birthday, chip . . . two days late.

happy birthday bobby

i love you bobby. i love that you let me dress you up as a girl over and over and over, makeup and all. i love that you made a "treasure hunt" for the family by drawing dollar signs on the all the walls and carving even more into the window sills. i laugh every time i think of mom making you run laps around the house with the hope of calming you down. i laugh even harder when i think of you walking down the hall complaining to mom that none of your "panties" were clean. and i secretly love, although it is completely disgusting, to remember all the meals you created with ranch dressing as the main course.

it is hard for me to think of you and not immediately picture the chubby 13 year old i left at home when i went off to college. . . but now you're all grown up. you're married (to someone i'm legitimately looking forward to being friends with) and have a life all your own. but you're still so fun to be near. you are so easy to laugh and joke with. and you still have the amazing gift of making people feel welcome and at ease. i'm lucky to have you for a brother and even luckier that you've forgiven me (you have, haven't you?) and like me after all the torture i put you through as a child.

happy birthday bobby. come to visit us soon.

feliz cumpleanos jeanie

i love you jeanie. i love thinking about all the time you spent braiding my hair when we were younger so i could look pretty on the first day of school and valentine's day (heart shaped french braid, anyone? jeanie's your gal). i love that you made my wedding cake. i love your laugh, and how easily it comes. i love how kind and gentle you've always been. i love going to garage sales with you, or any kind of sales. i love how fun and easy it is to spend time with you. i wish i had more of that time. although it has been 15 years since we lived in the same house, you've made your mark on my life. i make no-bake cookies, know a ridiculous amount of erasure songs, and think of you every time i buy smooth peanut butter. is there another child in the world who requested smooth jif peanut butter for christmas? happy birthday jeanie, can't wait to laugh together again soon.